CRASH GO THE CHARIOTS by Clifford Wilson, M.A., B.D., Ph.D.

Zip, bang, boom, and CRASH GO THE CHARIOTS! Lancer Books releases another anti-Chariots reader the same year as Popular Library's anthology Some Trust in Chariots, and like that volume you'd be hard pressed to guess the critical content given the packaging which promises more and greater revelations in the wake of von Daniken's ancient astronauts. But author Clifford Wilson isn't going to take any of von Daniken's nonsense lying down, and he's got mainstream and Biblical archaeology on his side - Wilson was a young earth creationist and proponent of Biblical truth who takes extreme issue with von Daniken's warping of basic historical facts as well as Biblical interpretations.

Wilson is especially incensed at von Daniken's slurring of archaeologists as a bunch of close minded, hidebound "experts" and describes his own experiences in the field working alongside both secular and religious minded researchers who were all professional enough to go where the facts lead ... Wilson just happens to thinks they lead to an inerrant Biblical truth and a geologically young earth!

Author Clifford Wilson (1923-2012)

These old school creationists can be quite logical in their own way, and Wilson's background allows him to neatly filet von Daniken's crimes against the Bible, including old standbys like Ezekiel's wheel, the atomic destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah, and the electrified, positized, nuclearized Ark of the Covenant.

During his fact checking episodes Wilson also lays out how von Daniken structures his own shaky arguments: railing at those nasty "experts," leaving out established answers to his many "mysteries," and always ending things with a giant question mark - meaning that von Daniken never has to stand behind any of his arguments and can always retreat to claiming to be "just asking questions."

I've already remarked how Lancer packaged their anti-Chariots books without any critical clues on the covers, as if they were worried readers wouldn't seek out a skeptical perspective. It seems like nowadays we don't even really have this soft pedaled "mainstream" counter to von Daniken, as the various Ancient Aliens shows churn on for year after year and alternate perspectives are limited to specific "skeptic" outfits like CSI (formerly CSICOP) and authors like Jason Colavito. Even Wilson's evenhanded religiosity is a thing of the past, as Creationism has long since been subsumed into the larger partisan right wing evangelical culture. This work is a snapshot of a time gone by, just as it describes ancient history and dusty archives.

Brad Steiger pops up in the back page ads with his book on Paul Twitchell and Eckankar, alongside Twitchell's own work, Aleister Crowley, and some other occult and astrology guides that Wilson surely wouldn't approve. Some big name science fiction and a couple of Exorcist cash-ins fill out the ads.

If footmen tire you, what will horses do? Crash Go the Chariots is available to read and download at archive dot org.

Lancer Books, 1972

SOME TRUST IN CHARIOTS edited by Barry Thiering and Edgar Castle

Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God. They are brought to their knees and fall, but we rise up and stand firm.

Psalms 20:7-8 New International Version (NIV)

New year, new BOMBSHELL books with the IRREFUTABLE TRUTH about man's ancient past! Popular Library doesn't tip their hand at all with the presentation, packaging this volume as just another Chariots follower, but how many readers got a shock when they actually started reading and found this to be a fairly dry, thorough analysis of von Daniken's lies, blunders, and misrepresentations? The editors have assembled a broad board of experts - mostly Australian, it turns out, and spurred to action by the thus far lackluster critical response to von Daniken's bestselling bollocks.

Theologians and archaeologists, an engineer and an anonymous wag, one thing you start to realize when reading this volume is how many disciplines von Daniken mangled with Chariots of the Gods? and how much effort it takes to straighten things out. Von Daniken bungles basic facts and figures, not even getting into the alien side of things yet. Says Professor Basil Hennessy: 

There's some focus on von Daniken's use of the pseudohistorical idea of Queztalcoatl as a white god, but this volume is mostly concerned with academic corrections, and we're still a few years off from von Daniken's Signs of the Gods wherein he ponders black people being a failed alien experiment engineered for music and basketball. The racial implications of white star gods raising/engineering nonwhite ancient peoples will only become more evident over the decades, but for now in 1972 these academic writers were staking out a rather lonely position standing against von Daniken's blockbuster cultural phenomenon.

It's frustrating to read this volume 50+ years on and still see the same old busted "evidence" trotted out nowadays in favor of von Daniken's chariots. Things like the Piri Reis map, the Nazca lines, misrepresentation of the Easter Island moai and pyramid construction ... on and on it goes. There's some dry humor here and there as evidenced by Professor Hennessy's callout above, and the final chapter is a fun exercise titled "Was Santa a Spaceman?"

Some Trust in Chariots is available to read and download at archive dot org.

Popular Library, 1972

EARTH'S HIDDEN MYSTERIES by Carl Cohen

Following up on Daniel Cohen's The Greatest Monsters in the World here's another young reader primer on the supernatural, by one Carl Cohen - no relation. This Cohen's book is far more scattershot, running through the Bermuda Triangle, Easter Island, the Mary Celeste, modern witches, UFOs, and the Oak Island Money Pit ... and that's that! Carl's not a patch on Daniel's writing ability, descending into kid's book treacle and uncritically repeating von Daniken's nonsense on Easter Island and spacemen. He even promotes von Daniken with the title of scientist, debating theories with other scientists! 

The urban legend of Oak Island is another example of rumor and myth being repeated ad nauseam until it takes on a life of its own. Fifty years after Carl Cohen tossed off a quickie chapter recycled from earlier writers, there's a long running reality show about the non-existent treasure playing on the History Channel. In the world of the paranormal, everything old is new again.

Nice cover art at least, and the UFO photos are delightfully bogus.

Xerox Education Publications, 1974

MYSTERY OF THE ANCIENTS by Eric and Craig Umland

We're going back to our roots with today's entry, some eminently readable nonsense courtesy the Umland brothers, riding on von Daniken's coattails with a special focus on the Maya and their irrefutable outer space connection! Rare enough for this genre, the Umland boys attest that the Maya peoples are still alive and well and living on planet Earth ... which makes it even odder when they pull out the usual unknowable "mysteries," as if we couldn't just pop down to the Yucatan and ask somebody about the Mayan moon bases! 

That's right, moon bases. The Umlands bring in some timely NASA coverup action - why did NASA and the USSR both put the kibosh on their lunar photography projects with only 10% of the moon covered? What were they afraid of finding, or what had they already found? And why won't the modern Maya admit their brothers are still up there, ready to invade at a moment's notice?

There's also death rays, Nazca lines, pyramid power and levitation, and assorted other super sciences which we've seen before many a time. But at least it's fast and fun, bringing to mind Warren Smith's beautiful pseudonymous piffle piece Gods, Demons, and UFO's. Much is made of Mayan sculpture and statuary supposedly portraying global peoples, which is the kind of gloriously loose pseudoscience reasoning that would take von Daniken twice as long to strangle out in one of his bloated books, with half the verve. The Umlands simply sum up von Daniken (and others like Robert Charroux) short and sweet.

This was the Umland brothers' only book, but it must have sold well because it received multiple editions. More silly details include flash frozen mammoths, von Daniken's fraudulent ancient Ecuadorean caves, Planet X blowing up into the asteroid belt, and the ancient Mayans spurning the wheel in favor of jet power! All of this in just 151 pages, plus a bibliography! It's mix and match mystery mongering at its best, shamelessly dumb, dense and dirty. Not bad, Eric and Craig!

Some other editions

Mystery of the Ancients is available to read and download at archive dot org.

Signet Books, 1975 (original pub. 1974)