It was just a matter of time ... there's only so many potential titles for an earthquake disaster novel, and sooner or later it had to be THE BIG ONE!
Our hero Ted Kowalcyzk - pronounced Kowal-sis-ick as an unfunny recurring gag informs us - is retired Special Forces, retired FBI now working in insurance, which is how he starts to sniff out something rotten in the state of California. It seems the big insurance companies are suddenly spooked about earthquake policies, almost as if they've got some inside intel ... and then Ted gets a mysterious package from an old friend who's just suffered a mysterious accident, and we're off to the races!
Or, at least we should be. Unfortunately, after a promising start all the sound and thunder about the Big One turns out to be a big MacGuffin for some substandard shoot-em-up action. All the depth and sensitivity that went into the characters of yesterday's The Nightmare Factor is lacking here, and good guy Ted is Exhibit A. He's a cardboard hero who's only flaw is that he just cares too damn much, and his tragic backstory - wife and kid shot down by a drug fiend connected to a case he worked - is cliche, as is his romance with his dead buddy's hot widow. The resident expository scientist, Dr. Winifred Wickshire, is an elderly rock doc whose treacly presentation soon becomes condescending. This is the kind of book where the good guys are just too cute, which robs the action of any suspense. We know how things are gonna go, especially when Ted can call up 70 (!!!) ex-Special Forces friends for an impromptu commando raid on the bad guys' compound. Again, where The Nightmare Factor's conspiracy unfolded with sinister precision and plausibility, here author Arnston also fumbles things. Spoiler: there's a bunch of government goons out at the Nevada Test Site working on some anti-earthquake super science, and there's some push and pull among the ranks whether the cure will be worse than the disease. There's potential here, but Arnston just can't pull it off!
All the silly runaround might be forgivable if the titular Big One lived up to its potential, but here too we're robbed. After an opening tremor sets the scene, the only other real action we get are some limp nightmare scenarios that wake Ted in the middle of the night, poor guy. Eventually we get round to LA's evacuation and martial law, but this is also bungled, with a top down view that wastes our time with Senators and Generals and "President Byron Walsh" all growling underbaked dialogue at each other. Will the Army's top secret nuclear fracking device defuse the Big One, or trigger an even bigger quake? Will the evacuation of LA prove to be the cure that kills, with millions of refugees at risk? Who cares!
For being one wet noodle of an action thriller, Arnston's The Big One gets ZERO destroyed cities out of four:
At least the cover's cool.
Zebra Books, 1990
